Hard Relationships

This is the type of person I want in my corner when things get hard and I need someone to carry me:

1. They need to love Jesus

2. They need to love you

3.  They have to be brave enough to call you out

4. They have to be willing to get in trouble with you

5. They have to be committed

What'd I miss?

Baseball is Life

I can remember when I was seven years old I went to a Giants and Dodgers game, I was as close to hell as I ever hope to get, Dodger Stadium.  In that game in 1992 a pitcher named Kevin Gross did the unthinkable to my Giants, he threw what is known in the biz as a no-no.  I was the only person in the stadium crying tears of anger and sadness as I walked out with my Dad who was wearing a Dodgers hat.

That same year on my way home from visiting my aunt and uncle in San Mateo I cried as news broke that the Giants were going to be moved to Tampa Bay.  They ended up staying.

A year later I was at Candlestick park sitting in terrible seats when chants began to ring out, first it was "BEAT LA" then an inning later it turned to, "DODGERS SUCK."

When I was ten I went to a game for my neighbors birthday, I got to run the bases at 3COM park at Candlestick Point.

In 2000 I went with my Dad sat 13 rows behind home plate and watched the fifth game ever played at AT&T Park as Barry Bonds faced off against Randy Johnson.

My Dad slipped into a coma that night he never woke from hours after Bonds broke the all time home run record of 755, he ended with 762.

I took Sarah on our first date to watch the Giants get beat by the Twins.

I took Cooper to his first game at four weeks, and Micah to his first at five weeks, it happened to be game three of the NLCS where Matt Cain shut down the Philadelphia Phillies.

I watched the Giants win their first World Series in 56 year with four generations of fans, the youngest being less than two months old and the oldest being in their 70's.

I watch baseball because I love the game.  I love situations, I love the grass, I love that the game that was invented over 150 years ago has remained largely unchanged, I love that no matter what happens in life, baseball will be there.  The history is rich, the stories have been written since the 1880's.

There is just enough time in baseball to see tragedy and triumph coming at you like a freight train.
There is enough time in life to have no clue what is going to happen.

Baseball, like any other hobby or sport that people love to revel in and waste time on, is great for enriching your life, but terrible for turning it into your life.  There was a successful t-shirt that said, "Baseball is life" I had one, I wore it with me blue and white striped denim shorts in the early 90's.  That shirt is not only wrong, it's sad.

Life is bigger than that, it is more important than that.  We've been entrusted to pass on a message that is better than tracking a team.  What have you dedicated your life to?

Confrontation Sucks

I hate confrontation.  Not like the kind where Maximus kills Caesar in the final scene of Gladiator, that type of conflict is awesome.  I don't like real conflict.  Real conflict like you see a brother or sister in Christ that needs to be loved back to where God wants them and the only way to do that is by speaking truth into their life, real, nasty, hard to swallow, truth.  These conversations are terrible, no one looks forward to them, but in order to continue growing in faith you have to have hard conversations, you have to do hard things.

Growing up I didn't like to stir the pot, I was often referred to as the voice of reason because I never wanted to rock the boat I never wanted to do anything that was going to get me in trouble, no matter how big the explosion was or how many pieces it blew up into.  I like being safe, I liked being comfortable.  Throughout these least two years I have come to terms with the idea that if you want to be a good man, husband, disciple, and friend you have to have hard conversations.  You have to have conversations that make you uneasy because these conversations are what help people grow, they help us grow.

I am glad I have a group of friends that is more than willing to nail me to the wall if I am acting in a way that is unrepresentative of the body of Christ.  I am glad I have friends who will look me in the eye and tell me I am wrong.  I am glad I have friends that will walk next to me and at times carry me towards righteousness when I have no more strength and a loss of will.

Hard conversations suck.

Confrontation sucks.

You know why people hate lifting weights?  (Other than the fact that it is boring and repetitive (just so I don't offend any really strong people, I lift weights and is may main source of exercise, so back up or I will flex my tricep in your general direction)).  People hate lifting weights because you are literally tearing your muscles in order for them to repair themselves and make the bigger and stronger.  Last time I checked tearing my muscle wasn't on my short list of things that reminded my of puppies and clouds made of cotton candy.

It's the same thing with confrontation.  It sucks, it is literally you telling someone you deeply care about about blind spots in their life. I can't guarantee it will make them a better person, but I can guarantee you will become a stronger version of yourself if you have hard conversations.

Waiting Expectantly

I have had a lot of things get my hopes up in the last few days, the first came on Sunday when I heard for the first time that one of my all time favorite shows 'Arrested Development' is coming back for a fourth season as a prequel to a movie that will be released in 2013.

Today Sarah and I get to put an offer in on a house that we hope will be our home for a very long time.  Yesterday we went to our broker and got pre-qualified for what we are willing to pay for this home and now, we start the wonderfully terrifying journey of purchasing a home.

Today Apple will introduce their iPhone 5.

All of these things have me more excited than the Dodger players getting news that they would still get paid regardless of filing for bankruptcy.  Two of these things I know will go the way I want them to.

Apple will deliver, they always do and I just checked for when I am due for an upgrade, (not
until April unfortunately).  I am pretty sure the new iPhone will do all my work for me, including working out.  Awesome.

Arrested Development will meet my expectations for the simple fact that it has been gone for five years, I have watched the series four times and at this point anything new from the Bluth family is welcome.

The one I am not sure of is this whole house purchasing thing.  The most important financial decision Sarah and I will make in our entire lives is coming to a head in the coming weeks.  This is somethign Sarah and I have soaked in prayer to the best of our ability, God has closed doors on our faces over the past 8 months, we sold a house to buy a specific one only to find out an offer had been accepted the day before we could put an offer in.  We lived with my in-laws, my grandfather-in-law, and now we rent a house waiting and waiting and waiting.

We want our home to be a place of refuge for people when they come over, we want our home to be a way to bless God with what he has given us, we want to make sure we are being good stewards of what we have been entrusted with.

This home could be the home our kids grow up in, get their license in, leave from when they go to college.

Terrifying.

But our home is where we are.  It doesn't matter where we are, we are the Anderson's and where we lay our head at night doesn't change that.

If you have read this far do me a favor and pray for us today, if this isn't where we are supposed to be pray that God would slam the door (gently) and make it evident where he does indeed want us.  Have a good Tuesday waiting expectantly for what God has for you.

Gaming (Not the Nerd Kind)

Here's the deal, I love games.  I play games at our youth ministry as a way of getting students involved, getting them more comfortable, and as a way for them to interact with other students and volunteer staff.  Last night at Youth we played a game that myself and Alex Harrington, a now graduated student made up one day.  It is called Ninja Assassin, and it is glorious.

I won't explain the whole game, but you have three ninja assassins, they "kill" others by sliding two fingers across their neck, when that happens the civilian dies.  Ninjas are killed by pulling off a ski mask they are wearing.  When/if a ski mask is taken by a civilian, they put it on and are now the ninja assassin.  Ninjas can kill other ninjas and the mask they take acts as an extra life.  There are no trials and the game doesn't stop until the time limit is reached or there is only one person remaining.  Also, and most importantly, the game is played in the dark in a three story church, incredible, I know.

When I play games I am kind of like a cat and an owl combined, not fast and smart, I sit on top of things and make loud noises.  I have noticed a few very distinct personalities that come out during these games that I thought you should know so next time you play Ninja Assassin, or any game of the kind, you can be prepared:

1. The Closet Mountain Lion:  This is the girl you think is really sweet, innocent and quiet.  She probably hasn't said anything all night except how you look like a middle-aged Brad Pitt, don't be upset she said middle-aged though, Brad at any point is a compliment.  She probably drinks water and not soda and will give away the candy I threw to her in the audience because she got an answer right.  Don't be fooled, she is dangerous, she's ready to pounce and go for the jugular as soon as she is within striking distance.  Did you know the spacing of the mountain lions four canine teeth are exactly the width of a single vertebrae of a deer, hers most likely match up with your spine perfectly.  Don't be fooled, she will win in the end, and she will let you know about it.

2.  The Over-Aggressive:  You have told this kid to calm down 6 times, three guys have been socked in the nose, a sprained ankle, a concussion, and some cracked ribs are all the result of this player and I barely finished giving the rules.  I get it, you want to play and win, so do I, but don't push me over the railing trying to get the ski mask off my head, you can have it, I don't want to die.

3. The James Statton:  I had a student whose motto was, "If you ain't cheatin' you ain't tryin'."  He has better grammar than that in real life, but his motto held true for the vast majority of the games we played.  Granted he was better at most games physically, but he could find a loop hole in my rules faster than I could explain in the game.  THinking back I think he had a gift that I probably should have encouraged more.  Either way, this student will indeed cheat at every possible juncture to win, playing to win isn't good enough winning to win is the only way to keep this player happy.

4.  The Honest Abe-  Lincoln was honest but he always gave it the old college try.  This student is the one who keeps in mind where they are and the point of what they are doing.  They are here to have fun and enjoy their friends. These are the students I wish I was more like in high school.  Truth be told I was probably a combo over-aggressive/James Statton.  This person will mock you for getting to into the game and laugh at you when you cheat to win, they will also try their hardest when it is their turn to step up to the plate.  All in all, they frustrate an over-aggressive because they don't seem to care enough about the game to hurt others to win, and frankly, I say, good for them.

What personality are you when when you play games?  Which ones did I miss?  Let me know.

Foods I Love(d)

Yesterday our Junior Pastor Andrew came in to the office and offered me a free burger from Carls Jr.  It wasn't just any burger though, it was my life blood throughout high school, my mandatory stop when I was in Merced, this burger is the very reason I had to watch what I was eating starting my Senior Year of High School, it was the Western Bacon Cheese Burger.  It is terrible, and full of stuff that shouldn't be put into your body in the form that it comes, and I have done a great job at swearing off the WBCB (my pet name for it) but today I couldn't handle it anymore, I felt like Squints in the movie 'Sandlot' when his hormones finally get the best of him and he tricks Wendy Peffercorn into kissing him, except this was a burger not a lifeguard, and I ate it, I didn't make out with it.

So what's the big deal? Its just a burger.  Until today I had done really well on my diet and exercising, a slipped up a few times but today after indulging in the barbecued goodness that is processed beef topped with fried everything and bacon, I felt like everything I had done until this point had been erased.  I know it hasn't, but it inspired me to make a list of things I won't be eating ever again, or as long as I don't eat them, whichever comes first:

1. Reese's Twister from Foster's Freeze:  It is so good, the perfect blend of peanut butter, chocolate, and vanilla ice cream sliding over your taste buds sends you into a sense of euphoria.  Maybe it's a food coma I am thinking of cause this little baby, the small, allots for half of your daily caloric intake, the small!  This is tough for me as I work literally 100 yards from Foster's, and I am pretty sure the don't have fro-yo and celery sticks as an alternative.

2.  Sal's Salsa- Technically this is a lie, I will eat Sal's salsa again, just not while I am in the restaurant, they trick you by putting the salsa next to the chips, before you know it you are on your fifth basket of corn tortilla chips and the waiter hasn't even taken your order yet.  Salsa = Good, as long as it is on toast with eggs whites, but they discontinued that at Sal's due to a low demand, something about not having enough lard in the ingredients.

3.  Soda- I love soda, it tastes good, it's refreshing, they have cool logos on their cans, but a smart man once said, "Don't drink soda." I am no idiot, I listen to smart people.

4.  Cheese- Growing up my teacher's always told me about cheese being in the dairy category of the food pyramid.  If it made the pyramid, you were to eat it.  I grew up eating cheese faster than cows could produce it, or the Hilmar cheese factory, one of the two.  It was the perfect snack for a lazy teen, easy to prepare, if there was only a bit left you didn't even have to slice it, you just got a block of cheese to eat while watching the Simpsons at 5:00 and 6:00 every night on Fox. Somewhere along the line someone informed my that cheese is not something that should be consumed in large quantities, unfortunately for me it is the only way I consume cheese so I must banish it, forever.

5.  Jelly Donuts-  You would think one would satisfy your desire to have sweets in the morning but you'd be wrong, I am pretty confident these are 95% air, therefore forcing you to eat at least 7 to be completely full (someone check my math, I switched to a Communications Major for a reason).

Thank you for letting me tell you what I won't be eating for until forever, it really helped me realize how much I miss the incredible taste of processed fat.  What is your go to food when you want your caloric fill in 15 minutes?  These have all at one point or another been mine, thank God it wasn't all in the same meal, I probably would have exploded from joy or sugar poisoning, is that a thing?

This is Enough

Yesterday, Sarah and I noticed a sizable leak coming from the toilet in our master bedroom, it proceeded in the wall and into a storage closet in our bedroom.  We we lifted things off the floor in the closest they were wet and moldy.  It was a disaster, and by was I mean is, we are sleeping in the guest bedroom until it gets fixed.  On the bright side it is kind of cute watching Cooper and Micah walk around in little toddler sized gas masks.

We have been renting this house for the past few months waiting until we are qualified to buy another home to do just that.  The original intention was to buy the house we are renting, truth be told, between the leaking sewage incident and the fact that I don't think us and the owners are going to get to a price we are both happy with we have been looking elsewhere.  I mean, Sarah has been searching online, but when you are looking in a small town like Kingsburg for a home, you will probably drive by a new home for sale before you see it online.  Needless to say, we are on the hunt and have a beaut in our sights.

I won't tell you where it is because I don't want you to stalk me, actually you can stalk me, just don't put an offer in on the house we want.

It never seizes to amaze me how God reminds you that he is in control, and in ways that a lot of times frustrate teh heck out of me.  After seeing and drooling over the home we saw, Sarah came home and listened to a sermon by Brad Bell.  She felt convicted about giving something more attention than her relationship with God, I merely told her to stop listening to Brad.  She remained adamant though and has forced us to slow down and count the blessing God has given us already.

I have been thinking about the phrase, "This is enough."

As in, "God, this is enough.  You have blessed me immensely and now you are just showing off.  I have two healthy kids, a job, a wife with a job, a car that runs smoothly (most days) and an incredible base of friends and family.  This is enough.

And every time I get anxious and worry about financials or try to tell other buyers that their are ghosts in the house, I remember that this is enough.

What blessing do you have that you forget about?  Maybe they are staring you in the face and you are looking right passed them.  How about the ability to have a kid?  What about having a job, even if you hate it?  What about having enough money to food on the table every night?  What blessings are you forgetting about?

As you recount them, remember, "This is enough."

Dad Apps

Last week I talked about the apps that sit around on my phone and I don't use, my crap apps if you will. As you can probably figure I have an iPhone, we have a love hate relationship, I love it and I hate when it isn't with me. It has essentially replaced every other piece of technology I use on a regular basis other than my computer that I use for word processing and blogging. So instead of the terrible apps that have no point of being on my phone, lets talk about the apps I use on a daily basis as a dad.


1. Camera- I wish I had the money to get a camera I don't know how to operate, but I don't so instead of packing a camera and extra charger, I don't. The camera on my phone takes relatively good pictures and the majority of the pictures we take come from it. If I want to edit my pictures I have the ability to, if I want to be trendy I can instagram it up. I can instantly upload pictures of my ridiculously cute kids to Facebook. We have more pictures of our kids this year because of this app than my mom has of me, ever.

2. White Noise- This has been a lifesaver on numerous occasions. We use this app to drown out the other sounds while our kids are sleeping. This app has come to our rescue when we forget the kids sound machine and has also been incredible to not have to pack the bulky CD player or sound machine when we go on trips, again, it is in my pocket and good to go.

3. Peekaboo Wild- Kids meltdown, it is inevitable and only a matter of time. Cooper has outgrown this app and gets bored pretty easy but Micah has just discovered how incredible this is. It makes a 15 minute car ride bearable when it could have been a stressful crazy disaster.

Again, I love my phone, and for different reasons but it makes parenting easier and I am able to catch more memories because of it. There are always those times that your phone can be a distraction, so be wary of overusing technology and overusing your phone. Be present when your kids are but if used correctly, can be a great addition to your parenting arsenal.

Here's some fun Coop had on my phone the other day.

What'd I Just Say?

As I was walking into church this morning with my wife and two kids we ran into our good friends the Silvas.  They have been parents now for about 5 months and are very much into the swing of parenthood.  I know this because as we approached the church Denver asked his wife if she remembered the 'Horsey.'  He was referencing the unicornesque stuffed animal that is one of their kid's favorite toys, but hearing a man as rugged as Denver watering down a word to make it more kid friendly made me laugh a bit and simultaneously lose respect for him as a man.  I started thinking about all of the hits my manhood has taken by the change in language that occurred when a kid popped out of my wife.  Here are a few words that I never would have said as bachelor but now are in my everyday vocabulary:

1. Cute- Sounds innocent enough right?  Wrong.  I can feel the testosterone leaving my body any time I say, "Sarah, Micah looks so cute in that sweater vest and button up shirt outfit today."  It is like that word is the thorn and manliness is the inflatable raft you bought this summer at Walgreens for 7.99, if they ever touch, it is gone forever.   Sounds innocent, and that is the problem, it sounds innocent.

2.  Y, EY, IE, S- These are suffixes that have the power to emasculate any word within a five mile radius.   Even gross words are disarmed by these suffixes, poopy, toots, tinkles, etc.  If you utter words with these suffixes it is quite possible your facial hair will fall out and you will start smelling better immediately.  At first it sounds like a good trade off, all you have to do is add a Y to the end of a word and you don't have to shave anymore, sweet.  You are wrong though, who is the last man you respected without any facial hair that isn't me?  Thats what I thought, none men, and my grammar is incorrect because it made me feel more good about I as a manly.

3.  Potty- Being in the midst of potty training with Cooper I say this word hundreds of times a day, in fact the most commonly heard phrase in our house right now is, "Cooper, do you have to go tinkles on the potty?"  Really!? A twenty year old version of myself would have beat me up for saying anything even remotely close to that.

4.  Paci  (Pass-ee)- Is in Pacifier shortened.  This is a word that I thought was a good compromise at first because I wasn't going to be caught dead saying "binky."  It doesn't matter if it is binky, paci, or meemer, they all sound like sound effects for a terrible action movie.  You know how Chuck Norris is going to die? I do.  He is going to say the word 'paci' and roundhouse kick himself in the mouth for saying it.

5.  Bah-bah- As in bottle.  Bah-bah isn't bad, for a one year old they can say it and they know what you are referring to so it isn't so much baby talk for the sake of baby talk but rather for the sake of communication, it is his evil twin brother with a creepstache that stays home online talking to hot chicks that I have an issues with, bah-bahs.  It is an abbreviation of the actual word combined with the emasculating suffix of 'S' that causes this word to be so disarming to manhood that if uttered you are forced to buy an American-Girl doll and take it with you everywhere.  It is a terrible occurrence but I have seen it happen, twice.

In reality I don't have beef with any of these words as I use them on a regular basis but still enjoy watching baseball even if I don't understand the rules or chatting over a warm cup of coffee cuddled in a soft blanket with my BFF. Crap.

Moms and Dads, what are some words that entered into your home when a baby did?  I really am interested to hear these, please leave your comments below.  Happy Monday.

Musings on the Week

Since I am at home a lot now I don't get a chance to talk with adults as much as I used to, because of that I have a lot of thoughts run through my head that I don't get to talk about to people over three feet tall.  That being said, here are my thoughts throughout the week:

1.  I drank more coffee than I should have this week, I believe it is related to getting less sleep than I should have but I am not confident in that assessment, I will let you know when my children wake me up at 5:30 tomorrow.

2.  Complaining about Facebook on Facebook is like complaining about animal rights while cooking a     t-bone.  Don't like it? Switch to Tofu.  Don't like tofu?  Good, Ron Swanson would be proud of you.  Don't know who Ron Swanson is?  That means you spend too much time watching Meredith Grey sulk and not enough time laughing your head off.  Don't know who Meredith Grey is? Congrats on being the .5% of our population who is living their own adventure rather than watching someone else's.
(Note: I am not part of that .5%)

3.  Mark Zuckerberg is every bit as awkward as me my Sophomore year. (I was a late bloomer, you want to fight?)

4.  Don't fret if your kid isn't reaching benchmarks before all of their punk friends, with their dry underwear and their ability to remember the number 15 when counting to 20, God made them perfect and they will hit their benchmarks when they are ready and God has planned.

5.  When potty training sometimes you just have to throw underwear away.

6.  When your kid is potty training sometimes you just have to throw underwear away.

7.  A well timed poop joke is the best fodder for comedy.

8.  Audiobooks are great as long as you want to listen to the same person talk for five hours straight without remembering a word of what they said.

What are some of your random thoughts throughout the week?  What about Facebook's announcements or the Dodger fans that finally have something to cheer about (the inevitable collapse of my favorite team, the Giants)?  Have a good Friday, I hope as you read this I am asleep or drinking my third cup of coffee.